Drum roll please....Inhaling courage and exhaling confidence my peeps will be supportive as I finally share the deets on my “Releasing My Inner Ugly Ducking for A Cause” adventure.
Much like I did when taking on my adventure, I’m pushing myself out there center stage to let you know what I did that was so super crah-crayze and out of character for me. It bubbled up all kinds of old and new insecurities, including these top 10:
Fortunately, I made the decision to say YES to the adventure, after:
Anywho, before you tire of reading this post, here we go...without further delay, I’m pulling the curtain back for the big reveal:
I’m a Love, Twelve Pin-up!!!!!
That’s right, I accepted the invitation from the fabulous Tracy Birdsell, my new found Survivor Sistah, to participate in her passion project Love, Twelve and basically become a “Calendar Girl”.
I jumped a plane down to Los Angeles a little over a month a go and had an AH-mazing adventure to raise awareness and funding to address the needs and interests of young women surviving cancer AND to release “my inner ugly duckling” for good!
After ninja-skillful Make-up Artist Lacy finished transporting my look to the glamourous film noir age and slipping on the divine dress selected by Tracy and provided compliments of Unique Vintage, my “ugly duckling” was aflutter and uber-uncomfortable as all the insecurities bubbled on up again. Fortunately, with Tracy’s positive energy and encouragement from behind her camera lens, Lacy’s make-up artistry and the beautiful dress that my heasts came in handy for holding up ;) the insecurities were blown away as I grew more confident, channeled my inner Josephine Baker, Lena Horne and Etta James and remembered my MoXie Mantra: “to not waste a moment and live life fully, presently and as a joyful adventure.”
Here’s the scoop on Love, Twelve -- I trust that you can see why I took on this fabulous adventure: it was for a great cause, including my own selfish healing:
Love, Twelve aims to converge art, knowledge, friendship and a positive, supportive community of caring and healing for women directly and indirectly coping with cancer. Every year, we invite survivors to pose for our annual vintage-inspired pin-up calendar, empowering women to reclaim their bodies from illness and from self-imposed limitations and share their stories of survival. These Pin-Up images are meant to encourage strong, vivacious women to reclaim their bodies from illness, and to have fun while doing it (with a bit of nostalgic sass on the side). Pin- up is our metaphor for hope and courage.
Tons of serendipity mojo was all over this life-affirming adventure. From having my curiosity piqued by a post that mentioned Tracy and Love, Twelve in an on-line Business Forum I joined years ago and only recently started to actively participate in, to clicking the post and landing on her website and being moved to tears by Tracy and her introductory video, and then immediately sending her the following email message and getting a response and having just a few short additional email exchanges that led to me taking flight -- all within a couple of weeks:
And the cherry on top to all this sweet serendipity is that Tracy decided to have my pic be the one for December! That’s right folks, I’m:
Miss December :)
(If I wasn’t concerned about exhausting your interest in reading this post, I’d circle back to the issues of race, gender, body-image, feminism, etc. I raised earlier...but, I want you to hang in there and finish reading this and join me in completing my 1st of 40 Acts of Courage, Gratitude & Service. Plus, I gotta have something to share in future posts ;)
Who knew this Fall/Halloween adventure would help me wrap-up on reclaiming my Christmas?! Crazy spin on the “Nightmare Before Christmas”, right?!
Would love your support and hope you’ll join me and help me nail my 1st of 40 Acts of Courage, Gratitude & Challenge: getting 40 of the Love, Twelve calendars out into the world to support Tracy and Love, Twelve to raise awareness and funding to address the unique needs and interest of young women surviving cancer. Please comment on this post &/or accept my Facebook invitation to let me know you will take action to Trick Cancer Up by enjoying the Three Treats below as you “MoXie Up & On” with me to complete this challenge:
Borrowing from Lady GaGa, “Applause, Applause” for sticking with me to the end of this post and hopefully for joining me & Tracy in pinning up your support for young women surviving cancer, one bombshell at a time.
Until next time, Moxie Up & On. - Michelle
Much like I did when taking on my adventure, I’m pushing myself out there center stage to let you know what I did that was so super crah-crayze and out of character for me. It bubbled up all kinds of old and new insecurities, including these top 10:
- Realizing that I have still have some remnants of a negative body image influenced by the echoes of being called “Creature from the Black Lagoon” and rascist slurs such as Chinq, Gook & Jap in elementary school;
- Having a body morphed by my choosing a bilateral mastectomy with hip flap reconstruction and other tremendous physical changes due to cancer treatment - WARNING...big OOOvershare coming: all kinds of “girl parts” changed or removed - think breasts to heasts and ovaries and fallopian tubes, respectively ;)
- Putting my full cancer journey out into the world beyond my closest peeps, including my BRCA2 genetic predisposition and reconstruction choice (knowing legislation was passed to prevent discrimination and that new healthcare changes prohibit denying people with pre-existing conditions helps me feel a bit safer in sharing this);
- Being seen as a sell-out to my feminist sensibilities;
- Having braces (and to think I thought I was too old when I first had a consult for them at 26!);
- Not feeling that I’m very photogenic - reference #1, #2 & #5 above ;)
- Being associated with something beyond what “good girls” are supposed to do;
- Uncovering my connection to the adjectives: beautiful and sexy (can you tell I went straight back up into my head even in putting this on the list). I’ve always been the “dog” (think back to “The Truth About Cats & Dogs” and you’ll get what I mean by this) and somehow I’ve thought being a feminist involved being removed from any appreciation of the female body -- reference #4 above) ;
- Traveling by myself to the Big City of Los Angeles (I’m still a small town Mississippi country girl at heart) to take on a project with a complete stranger and stay at her home; and
- Fear of being chopped into a gazillion pieces by a stranger I met via the Internet -- hmmmm, perhaps this one was really more of my husband’s concern than mine.
Fortunately, I made the decision to say YES to the adventure, after:
- drawing deeply upon the personal commitment I made to the spirits of four women friends that were some of the few silver linings of the cancer cloud who sadly taken way before their time by cancer: “to not waste a moment and live life fully, presently and as a joyful adventure each and every day”;
- considering the potential difference I could make for other young women surviving cancer;
- googling my new connection before I booked my flight to lay to rest fears of being lured into a human chop shop ;)
- even just a few emails and a phone chat, feeling like I was connecting with an old friend rather than a stranger -- again, one of just a very few silver linings is the almost instant sense of sisterhood and community when coming across a fellow Survivor; and
- perhaps, I listened one too many times to Brave and Roar :)
Anywho, before you tire of reading this post, here we go...without further delay, I’m pulling the curtain back for the big reveal:
I’m a Love, Twelve Pin-up!!!!!
That’s right, I accepted the invitation from the fabulous Tracy Birdsell, my new found Survivor Sistah, to participate in her passion project Love, Twelve and basically become a “Calendar Girl”.
I jumped a plane down to Los Angeles a little over a month a go and had an AH-mazing adventure to raise awareness and funding to address the needs and interests of young women surviving cancer AND to release “my inner ugly duckling” for good!
After ninja-skillful Make-up Artist Lacy finished transporting my look to the glamourous film noir age and slipping on the divine dress selected by Tracy and provided compliments of Unique Vintage, my “ugly duckling” was aflutter and uber-uncomfortable as all the insecurities bubbled on up again. Fortunately, with Tracy’s positive energy and encouragement from behind her camera lens, Lacy’s make-up artistry and the beautiful dress that my heasts came in handy for holding up ;) the insecurities were blown away as I grew more confident, channeled my inner Josephine Baker, Lena Horne and Etta James and remembered my MoXie Mantra: “to not waste a moment and live life fully, presently and as a joyful adventure.”
Here’s the scoop on Love, Twelve -- I trust that you can see why I took on this fabulous adventure: it was for a great cause, including my own selfish healing:
Love, Twelve aims to converge art, knowledge, friendship and a positive, supportive community of caring and healing for women directly and indirectly coping with cancer. Every year, we invite survivors to pose for our annual vintage-inspired pin-up calendar, empowering women to reclaim their bodies from illness and from self-imposed limitations and share their stories of survival. These Pin-Up images are meant to encourage strong, vivacious women to reclaim their bodies from illness, and to have fun while doing it (with a bit of nostalgic sass on the side). Pin- up is our metaphor for hope and courage.
Tons of serendipity mojo was all over this life-affirming adventure. From having my curiosity piqued by a post that mentioned Tracy and Love, Twelve in an on-line Business Forum I joined years ago and only recently started to actively participate in, to clicking the post and landing on her website and being moved to tears by Tracy and her introductory video, and then immediately sending her the following email message and getting a response and having just a few short additional email exchanges that led to me taking flight -- all within a couple of weeks:
- So touched by your video and cause, especially as I'm also a breast cancer survivor (received the worst Christmas present ever in December 2007). I'm in the process of developing a campaign in connection to my upcoming 40th birthday in April 2014 to raise funds to support a survivorship retreat for young women. Not sure how I can help you but if you'd like to connect to see how we might be able to support each other, please reach out.
And the cherry on top to all this sweet serendipity is that Tracy decided to have my pic be the one for December! That’s right folks, I’m:
Miss December :)
(If I wasn’t concerned about exhausting your interest in reading this post, I’d circle back to the issues of race, gender, body-image, feminism, etc. I raised earlier...but, I want you to hang in there and finish reading this and join me in completing my 1st of 40 Acts of Courage, Gratitude & Service. Plus, I gotta have something to share in future posts ;)
Who knew this Fall/Halloween adventure would help me wrap-up on reclaiming my Christmas?! Crazy spin on the “Nightmare Before Christmas”, right?!
Would love your support and hope you’ll join me and help me nail my 1st of 40 Acts of Courage, Gratitude & Challenge: getting 40 of the Love, Twelve calendars out into the world to support Tracy and Love, Twelve to raise awareness and funding to address the unique needs and interest of young women surviving cancer. Please comment on this post &/or accept my Facebook invitation to let me know you will take action to Trick Cancer Up by enjoying the Three Treats below as you “MoXie Up & On” with me to complete this challenge:
- Be inspired by Tracy as she shares her very personal story of why she created Love, Twelve: http://youtu.be/5XUoS89FCU0
- Drop me a "love bomb" and pin-up your support for young women surviving cancer and help provide funding for Love Twelve to increase resources for women like me...providing them support so they aren’t alone in their cancer journey: ORDER YOUR VERY OWN LOVE, TWELVE CALENDAR . http://lovetwelve.com
- Join the Love, Twelve community and get updates on how it continues to support even more young women surviving cancer to thrive -- like Love, Twelve on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LoveTwelve
Borrowing from Lady GaGa, “Applause, Applause” for sticking with me to the end of this post and hopefully for joining me & Tracy in pinning up your support for young women surviving cancer, one bombshell at a time.
Until next time, Moxie Up & On. - Michelle
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